You snooze, you lose

I used to think my mornings were crazy.  Used to.  When all of my kids could independently feed themselves.  When we didn't have to be out the door until 8:45.  When there was still time for a cup of coffee and dare I say, breakfast for mom. 

I now have a new perspective of crazy mornings.  This one was no different. 

I slept in.  Yep, I slept in after staying up later than usual at a neighbor's house last night (and before you get any wild ideas - later than usual is 10:30).  Slept in.  I got up at 6:30.  My college self is gaping at my current self with a mouth wide open.

Lunches were packed last night, backpacks ready to go.  We didn't have to leave until 7:45.  What could go wrong? 

First, it's Mass Day at school, meaning my kindergartner needs a tie on.  With a mom who doesn't know how to tie a tie.  The hubs is already at work.  I call my neighbor and beg her husband to come by and tie my child's tie on the way to work (note to self - search youtube later for: "idiot's guide to tying a tie").  I get the big boys' breakfast ready and go get the baby up.  He is covered in spit-up.  Seriously, it is everywhere.  From a physics perspective, I don't even know how it is possible.  I clean him up, strip his sheets and head downstairs to start a load of laundry.  After I hit "start" on my front loader, my 4-yo informs me that he had an accident in his bed before he woke up this morning and he also needs clean sheets.  Back upstairs to strip another bed.  Confident now that my older children are happily eating their breakfast, I sit down in the den to nurse the baby.  Current time: 7:00. 

As I nurse the baby, the other kids finish their breakfast.  I tell the two oldest to go and get dressed.  All three go upstairs.  Minutes later, I hear the sound of something being dumped out onto the floor.  And then again.  I finish nursing, run upstairs to the nursery to discover that my 2-yo and 4-yo have found the hidden bin of leftover party favors and accessories saved from the last 5 years of children's birthday parties and have dumped the entire bin onto the floor.  They have also found the basket of baby toys that the baby is not yet playing with and dumped it all over the floor.  I can now see about 4 inches of nursery floor space.  Current time: 7:15. 

Knowing that there is no way that I will be able to get this cleaned up in time to leave for school, I close the door (if you can't see it, it doesn't exist, right??) and shuttle everyone back to their bedrooms to get dressed.  On the way, I glance at the thermostat as it feels rather warm upstairs.  75.  It's set at 71.  Fabulous.  Again, no time to deal with that now.  My oldest is dressed (sans tie) and I send (for the 2nd time) my 4-yo to get dressed and take my 2-yo to dress him.  Everyone (except me) brushes their teeth and we head back downstairs.  Current time: 7:30.

Back downstairs, I realize that I am still in my pajamas.  I head BACK upstairs to dress before my neighbor comes by to help with the tie.  On the way downstairs, I see that it is now POURING down rain.  The street looks more like a river.  I put the baby on a blanket in the den for some tummy time and run to the kitchen to try to clean up breakfast dishes.  I notice that 2 out of 3 milk cups are still full.  Full of very expensive organic milk.  I REFUSE to throw this liquid gold down the drain.  I call the 2 culprits back in the kitchen to finish their milk as I gather up the dishes to stick in the dishwasher.  As I'm walking back across the kitchen to put away the cereal, my 2-yo tilts his milk cup one way and looks another way and proceeds to dump the entire thing on the floor.  I silently kick myself for not just dumping the darn stuff down the drain.  Current time: 7:40.

I calm him down, grab some towels and frantically mop up the spill.  My neighbor pulls up.  He helps my 5-yo with his tie.  I put the ice packs in all of the lunch boxes and get the backpacks by the door.  Current time: 7:50. 

I take the kids one by one into the car to keep them all "on task" so that they don't arrive to school soaking wet. 

I finally set the home alarm, climb into the driver's seat and start the car.  Current time: 7:55.  Soaking wet.  No breakfast.  And oh yeah, I forgot to brush my teeth. 

It's safe to say that I learned my lesson and will not snooze that alarm on a school day any time soon.  Or at least not until I forget about this morning.